I truly think that every person is a gift and has a gift. Depending on how a gift is wrapped, people tend to judge the quality of what’s inside it.
Think about it like Christmas time when you were a child. Chances are you snuck under the tree when your parents weren’t looking to see which gifts were for you. You’d note how big the gift was, whether or not it was in a box or had a weird shape, if it made a lot of noise when you shook it, if it was heavy or not. After your inspection you were probably almost certain you knew what it was.
I know I’m not the only one who’s ever guessed what a gift was and been super excited to open it up, only to see that it was not what you thought it was. Like thinking it was the karaoke machine you asked for, but it turned out to be school clothes your mom put in an old box. Now you’re sitting amongst all this wrapping paper thinking not only is it not what you wanted but your mom gave you school clothes in a box of pots and pans.
I find that I do that with “people presents” too. I size it up, guess what’s inside, and get excited about who I thought that person would be, only to find out that they’re nowhere near that expectation. I gotta learn how to stop admiring how pretty the wrapping paper is and how big the bow is and learn to wait until what’s inside is revealed.
I coulda saved myself hella heartbreak and betrayal if I had just waited to see what was inside the people presents instead of having blind faith and excitement over unsubstantiated feelings. How many of us do that? How many of us get our hopes up for a let down and then become jaded after experiencing so much disappointment?
Let’s be clear, I’m making this people presents reference in regards to romantic and non-romantic relationships.
There are men out there who look good af wrapped as a gift. He has his own house, a car, a good job, benefits, high credit score, he’s attractive, has a great personality and because he is wrapped in a big ole pretty box, you’re ready to throw him the box (box: n. meaning vagina). Valuable lesson I’ve learned over the last year; everything that glitters ain’t gold. And if you keep going after fool’s gold, that just makes you a fool. Guess who else is a fool? *Points to self* It’s okay, now you know better, you can do better.
There are “friends” out there, who love you and hate you at the same time and not in a good way. In the sense that they’ll celebrate you when you are doing well, but secretly want to see you fail or be you. OR they’re there for you when things are going well, but are nowhere to be found when times are tough. I remember when I was unemployed for 6 months I could count on ONE hand how many people even actually knew and cared. Any time before that I had so many people in my space that I had to move around furniture and open all the windows just to make breathing space. Be wary of the big bows labeled friend because when you actually unwrap that package, you may see that it’s a foe.
Sometimes your own flesh and blood can be a posing people present. I remember back when I first went off to school, one member of my family seemed to be so proud of me and happy that I was going off to school. Then one day we got into an argument and they told me that I thought I was better than them, that I went to school and forgot about where I came from, that just because I was going to graduate that didn’t make me above them. And this was coming from a close blood line, not like a 4th or 5th cousin. It was disheartening, it wasn’t my true feelings but it also was a reality check.
Sometimes the gift is everything you ever dreamed of, and sometimes it’s just school clothes.