So the last 2 months of my life have been a real sh!t show, I am truly debating whether or not I want to publish a tell all book or just slow leak the stories here. Since I’m no celebrity I don’t know how well a book would do, so slow leak it is.
In today’s post we’ll play a game called That’s Not Yo Bae Bish (Bae: (n) Meaning boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other), just to give you a little preview of some of the stories to come:
• If he never calls, emphasis on the NEVER (i.e. text message shawty) – That’s not yo bae bish
• If he only sees you at night/weekends (like y’all are part time lovers) – That’s not yo bae bish
• If the only dates you’ve ever “been on” include a Redbox/Netflix and a living room couch – That’s not yo bae bish
• If you come home early from work to bring “bae” a plate of food before he goes to work and an unknown chick is leaving – That’s not yo bae bish
• If you get into a fight
butt ass naked because “bae” let his baby momma in while you were seemingly in the bed sleeping one morning – That’s not yo bae bish
• If his wife calls you – That’s not yo bae bish
• If a random chick (not the wife) knocks on your door looking for him after keying his car – That’s not yo bae bish
• AND THE EFFIN COUP DE GRÁCE- If he posts a picture of his freshly born baby girl only 4 weeks after y’all stopped dealing with each other – THAT WASN’T YO BAE EITHER BISH
Some of these, scratch that most of these, ok damnit all of these situations have happened to me at some point in time. I’m pretty sure I am a magnet for dysfunctional relationships/whateverships, which is great for you because you get to be all like #coolstorybro meanwhile I’m featured in every episode of The Young and the Bae-less.
At this point I’ve been “single” for about a year, and I use the term single loosely because I called myself dating and that has just been
catastrophic an experience to say the least. I haven’t posted most of the stories because I’ve been protecting negroe’s feelings. But now, I’m team eff yo feelings; the worst thing you can probably ever do is piss off a writer who is an open book. I swear my life could be scripted for TV. But let’s be clear, I tell my story because it’s therapeutic for ME. I’m not looking for approval or validation or sympathy even; I just have some things to get off my chest. So gather round, take a seat – now this is a story alllll about how, my life got flipped-turned upside down….