So I’m just gonna pretend like I didn’t fail at my attempt to publish something that I’m thankful for every day and pick up where I left off
just like a man. Today I’m thankful for *drum roll please* … clocks! Well kind of, clocks aka time bka not really.
Generally speaking, time is never on my side; whether it’s when I meet a seemingly nice guy who’s just not ready for a relationship yet, if I try to run to Walmart and the lines are long with no self-checkout line, if I’ve got a dapper young gentleman in heavy pursuit of the cheeks, but my cycle is on, got somewhere to be, but there’s two accidents, a license check and traffic is stupid –like I feel like these situations ALWAYS happen to me.
Though time is not my friend, I appreciate clocks nonetheless, for a few reasons:
- I’d be screwed if I had to tell time based off the sun and shadows; I was not born with that survivor skill
- I need to set about 3 alarms every morning just to get up 30 minutes after they’ve started going off –not a morning person AT ALL.
- Clocks give me a guideline as to how I run my life; I’ll list some examples below.
- More practically, it provides a template to my wake up time, work hours and afternoon/evening festivities.
- It could be a count down of how long before an ass whipping occurs; either from ya mama or said person that you have pissed off i.e. “you got bout 5 seconds to get the hell outta my face. *looks at clock* 5…4…3…2…1.. <insert ass whooping>”
- It may serve as a measurement of my patience for example the time between entering and exiting work is a time of low patience, after work hours -I ain’t got no worries; so choose wisely when ya wanna approach the kid with some mess because I might just tell ya “ain’t nobody got time fuh dat” 🙂
Earlier today I was watching the clock sooooo intensely I’m pretty sure I looked crazy. I had a work meeting and it ran over the allotted time. I swear to you every minute past 12 was like jabs to my stomach, a chick was hawwwwngrrrryyy. But I made it out, and now *looks at clock* it’s about time for work to be over <insert jig here>.
The world would be such a hectic place without clocks, so in honor of this post, go out and buy a clock/ watch… or at least put some batteries in the one you already have (everybody got a clock somewhere that needs new batteries lol).